Ещё один пример того, как делать не надо

mysql_query("LOCK TABLES stories WRITE");
mysql_query("insert into stories set informer= '$news_im_infl', catid='$topic'...");
$query = mysql_query("select id from stories order by id desc limit 1");
mysql_query("UNLOCK TABLES");
$maxid = mysql_fetch_array($query);
mysql_query("insert into stories_stats set pid='".$maxid['id']."'");

Говнокод

Открыл /etc/crontab на одной из машин и увидел

* * * * * root /usr/bin/mysql dbname -e 'show full processlist' | grep 'LEFT JOIN followers AS fl ON m.user_id=fl.user_id AND fl.follower_id=' | grep 'LEFT JOIN users AS reply ON reply.login=m.reply_to_login AND reply.domain=m.reply_to_domain AND reply.name' | awk '{print "kill "$1";"}' | /usr/bin/mysql